The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
