i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
