Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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