My Higher Power is John Stamos
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
