its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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