I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
