i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I have already put on my inside pants.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
