I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
