it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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