Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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