why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
