who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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