They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
