Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
