Cold hands, warm shart.
false alarm. still invincible.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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