with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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