I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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