It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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