I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
