We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
