DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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