Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Randomize
