Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
