It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
