i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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