I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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