it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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