I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
