Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
