So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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