We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
