I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
