Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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