who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize