ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Mom said you looked used
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
