I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
