im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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