He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
