the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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