We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Randomize
