I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
