How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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