wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
They have beer where we have blood.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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