sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Randomize
