So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
