We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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