Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
