Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
