If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
please come you make the beer taste better
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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