Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
