White coat. Heels.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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