im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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